Gary Chapman PhD, author of the best-selling book The Five Love Languages, created
the concept of giving and receiving love in ways that are measurable and determine
how we engage the world.
Based on his work, each of us falls into categories that determine how we prefer to
express and receive love. This benefits us by better understanding ourselves, but
expands further when we apply the concepts to those close to us and better understand
how they give and receive love as well.
So, let’s take a look at the five love languages:
1. Words of Affirmation- This love language thrives in giving and receiving
nurturing and positive feedback. The Words of Affirmation love language is
represented by seeking understanding, asking for forgiveness when wrong,
sharing kind and encouraging words, and giving and receiving meaningful
2. Quality Time- The Quality Time love language is all about togetherness. The
distinction being the time is focused and centered on the relationship; time is
uninterrupted with no distractions. This is shown by putting away devices,
maintaining eye contact during conversations, active listening, and participating
in activities meaningful to the relationship.
3. Receiving Gifts- Receiving gifts is a timeless gesture of love and respect. Those
who have a primary love language of receiving gifts are uplifted by the sentiment
of the gift-giving more than the gift itself. It is all about what the gift represents
and the effort that was taken by the giver that means so much.
4. Acts of Service- This love languages distinction is doing things for others that
they appreciate. This love language has no gender, no bias, and no limits on
what may be offered in service. Husbands and wives serve independently of
traditional roles and norms. A wife can fill her husband’s car with gas or a
husband can vacuum the floor as an act of service and expression of love.
5. Physical Touch- This love language goes way beyond the obvious idea of sex.
This language is saturated in the warmth that comes from being present and
being in touch and in tune with the other party. Holding the hand of a friend in
distress. Sitting side-by-side with an anxious child. These are acts of love that
mean the world to a physical touch love language receiver.

You can take a simple test at 5LoveLanguages.com and discover your hierarchy of
languages. You may have a dominant language or a blend of more than one. Generally
speaking, how you prefer to express your love is also the same as how you prefer to
receive gestures of love. Check out your ratings and get more familiar with the concept
to enhance your interpersonal experiences.